| Rep. Thaddeus McCotter (R-MI), House Republican Policy Chairman, recently took to the House floor to translate Democrat speech for the rest of America - “Speaking Democrat: A Primer.” In the interest of legislative process, we hear many speeches on the floor, many members talk to their constituents; I'm going to try to bring a bit of enlightenment to this process . . . We're going to learn how to speak Democrat: |
Speaking “Local Democrat”
“PROGRESSIVE” = “REGRESSIVE”Speaking “Global Democrat”
Statement: “Democrats are progressive.”
Translation: “Democrats are regressive.”
“CHANGE” = “THE 1970s”
Statement: “Democrats will bring you change.”
Translation: “Democrats will bring you the 1970s.”
“GOVERNMENT” = “SOCIALISM”
Statement: “Democrats support proactive government.”
Translation: “Democrats support proactive socialism.”
“ENHANCE REVENUES” = “RAISE TAXES”
Statement: “Democrats will enhance revenues.”
Translation: “Democrats will raise taxes.”
“THE RICH” = “YOU”
Statement: “Democrats will only tax the rich.”
Translation: “Democrats will only tax you.”
“INVEST” = “WASTE”
Statement: “Democrats will invest your money.”
Translation: “Democrats will waste your money.”
“ENERGY” = “LETHARGY”
Statement: “Democrats have an energy policy.”
Translation: “Democrats have a lethargy policy.”
“GREEN COLLAR JOBS” = “UNEMPLOYMENT”
Statement: “Democrats will replace your blue collar jobs with green collar jobs.”
Translation: “Democrats will replace your blue collar jobs with unemployment.”
“DIPLOMACY” = “MAGIC”Contextually Construing “Electoral Democrat”
Statement: “Democrats will protect America from Iranian nukes through tough, principled diplomacy.”
Translation: “Democrats will protect America from Iranian nukes through tough, principled magic.”
“ENGAGE” = “APPEASE”
Statement: “Democrats will engage America’ enemies.”
Translation: “Democrats will appease America’s enemies.”
“END” = “LOSE”
Statement: “Democrats will end the Iraq War.”
Translation: “Democrats will lose the Iraq War.”
(i.e. Walking the Party Plank)
Statement: “As a progressive party, Democrats will bring you change by using government to enhance revenues from the rich to invest in the production of energy and green collar jobs; and by using diplomacy to engage America’s enemies and end the Iraq War.”
Translation: “As a regressive party, Democrats will bring you the 1970s by using socialism to raise taxes from you to waste in the production of lethargy and unemployment; and by using magic to appease America’s enemies and lose the Iraq War.”
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